Addiction....

Among the myriads of baby toys, there are a few that make sense or are truly cool; a blanket with one corner that has soft rubber on it so it can be an effective chew toy and rubber ducks that light up when placed in the bathtub (thanks mom!) are just a couple of examples.

There are also those that are incredibly obnoxious and/or pointless... i.e. anything that makes buzzing/beeping/squealing noises, talks in an annoying voice, plays an incredibly repetitive song (like the birthday card I bought my best friends two year old [insert evil maniacal laugh here]) or anything that promises to improve the intelligence of your child.

Then there are those true rarities, the toys that are so compelling to your little one that they become a premature addict. These toys vary from child to child, and can catch you completely by surprise. Our son was recently given a teething toy that vibrates when he bites down on it hard enough that he has become slightly addicted to. When the darn thing starts vibrating his eyes glass over, he stops fussing, and the drool starts coming even more profusely than it already does. This inevitably results in the following chain reaction: toy stops vibrating, toy falls from mouth, boy starts trying to put back in mouth, boy puts hard plastic part of toy in mouth (not soft vibrating part), boy starts crying because he cant figure out why the part of the toy in his mouth is neither soft nor vibrating when he bites on it, tired father puts (and holds) the soft part of the toy back into boys mouth, wash, rinse repeat. The boys father is a bit more of a pushover that his mother, who instead of feeding his "habit" will find creative ways to entertain him that doesn't require the use of the aforementioned toy.

The Joys of Travel

There was a time in my life when my wife and I could easily leave our abode in order to arrive on time (or close to on time) at our destination. I used shake my head at those parents who would arrive 5, 10, 15 minutes late with crying children in tow and a slightly crazed look in their eyes. I remember those days...those were good days.

Departing the house is now an ordeal. I have to, in my mind, plan an extra hour and a half for all scheduled departures and schedule about 3 weeks of prep-time if it involves an overnight stay. We are going to Chicago in mid February for 8 days....I started slowly packing bags about two weeks ago.

The one benefit about travel, more specifically air travel, is that I am now a "parent with small children." You know, the ones who get to board the plane before everyone...that's right all you suckers standing up 15 minutes before it's your turn to get on the flight, that's me with the small child getting on first....boooooyah! This, in my opinion, has got to be one of the biggest perks about having a child. Of course, this perk is immediately offset by the fact that your flight promises to be 10x more stressful than it ever used to be pre-child and because not only are you making everyone in line bitter because you get to board the flight first, but you are eliminating the possibility of a pleasant/quiet flight. So you can bet I am going to live up every second of my pre-boarding glory...

I think the real reason airlines allow "parents with small children" on first is to let everyone know who is to blame for the upcoming unpleasant flight. It's like they are saying "we try to make our flights pleasant for all of our passengers, we really do....but every once in a while some young parents think it is a good idea to travel with their new child....so when you are trying to sleep but cannot because of the screaming child three rows behind you, we are not to blame. Take a good look at these people, it is their fault not ours." I am already seriously considering getting a second job so I can pick up the drink tab for all passengers in the rows immediately in front, behind, and to the side of where we are sitting.

A nights sleep....

I will be the first to tell you that I don't have much to complain about when it comes to getting sleep through my sons first few months of life. My gracious and loving wife wakes up to feed him without complaint and Elijah, for his part, usually only wakes up once a night and goes to bed at 7:30. Yes, we (I) have it easy.

However, last night was a different story. As my wife likes to say, going backwards is one of the more difficult parts of being a parent. When you are used to your child sleeping pleasantly through most of the night it is especially stressful when he decides to wake up and scream again, and again, and again.

I awoke sometime last night around ten thirty to my son proclaiming he was unhappy. He is, if nothing else, very persistent. I think he takes after his father in that regards and so he cried for what seemed like decades, nay centuries (in actuality 15-20 minutes) before Katie decided that she would just feed him so he would cease and desist. I shut my eyes, only to open them again about 5 minutes later to him pontificating on the unfairness of the world. I had a cavemanesqe conversation with Katie consisting of a series of grunts that conveyed my amazement the boy was still crying...despite being fed a few minutes earlier. Katie was smart enough to look at the clock and tell me that he had had an hour and a half of sleep since he was fed and that it hadn't been one extended scream session. So Katie again got up, worked her magic and the boy went to sleep again.

I cannot imagine what it is like for all you poor dads out there who have children who scream regularly throughout the night...after just one night of multiple screamings I was beginning to nash my teeth, contemplate sending him to boarding school and soundproofing his room. So...to all you dads out there who have (or have had to at some point) lived on 2 hours of sleep a night, my heart goes out to you...keep on keepin on!

A change of direction...

So...after perusing some of the more prevalent blogs out there I have come to the conclusion that most successfull blogs have a specific theme as opposed to general ranting...while I enjoy to rant...to anyone who will listen...I am going to attempt to focus my ranting to being a new father. Although with that in mind...in all honesty our son Elijah is quite well behaved for a 4 month old and so my postings will likely be less ranting than musings...until he gets old enough to get into things, break things, pull things off shelves and generally cause havoc.

Just to emphasize my inner nerdiness...hope you enjoy